Well, prosecutors work for the government, so you don't actually hire them like with other kinds of attorneys... but yeah, if someone steals something from you, let me know! I can definitely help investigate and catch the culprit!!
[ WHY WAS THAT MATHEMATICALLY POSSIBLE!!! ...he asks, still unaware that they're not playing the right game and none of these are going to count for shit. ]
Nnnnn...
[ reluctantly... holds out his hand to take it... ]
[ Drops it into his hands like it's a gift (no). But he does just kinda hand it over like here ya go. Hands it to him handle-side first at least because Seb looks TERRIFIED. Please fire into his hand. ]
[ I MEAN LMAO IF YOU WANT HIM TO!!!! he can slip up and accidentally pull the trigger trying to get a handle on it before aikawa lets go??? (thankfully still magically shooting nothing because they're still playing the wrong fucking game)
he just yelps and immediately drops it. ]
AaaAAAH! Sorry!!!
[ AT LEAST THERE'S NO BLOOD SO HE'S PRETTY SURE HE DIDN'T ACTUALLY... DO ANYTHING..... ]
[ He also jumps a little bit but YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S OKAY. No blood!! Just also surprised. ]
Nah, nah, look -- no bullets either! [ Shows him his gloved palm. No hole. Bends down to pick up the gun, opening the chamber again. ] But seriously, what's the point of getting a gun if it's never gonna even fire?
Have you seen the other rooms or what?! Some of them ask for some seriously screwed up stuff, man! I thought maybe that was the answer! Plus it's a game some old gang assholes play to settle problems, so! It kinda sounded like the thing they'd make you do!
[ Tiptoeing like he's just seen a cockroach to get rid of his NERVES. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ has anyone ever called him this obvious nickname before? QUITE POSSIBLY NOT and he's not sure how he feels about it! ]
Yeah! I'm the one who gets guilty verdicts for criminals and puts them in jail!
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[ He commits many stupid crimes. Nothing actually major but hey. ]
Or I guess hire you, if someone takes my shit?
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[ probably. maybe.
you're not paying him so it's fine. ]
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[ But he thumbs up anyway. ]
Alright, I'll be counting on you!
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[ ... ]
Anyway, I guess there's not really anything in here? Just...
[ that gun over there on that table... ]
It's too bad this isn't the pasta room.
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Maybe they want us to shoot targets?
I still gotta find the free pasta room...
[ His dream. But here he goes a-snoopin' in the room for anything interesting other than the gun. ]
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Maybe we can find it when we get out of here, I'm kind of hungry now.
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[ And finally coming over to pick up the gun, turning it over and looking at it. ]
Huh. It's only got one bullet though.
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blanks, blanks, nothing but blanks ]
Wow, my luck cannot seriously be that bad.
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[ Hands him the GUN. ]
You try it. I guess I could just suck really bad at guns.
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[ HE JUST CALLED THE CHAMBERS "THINGS" DO YOU REALLY THINK HE KNOWS GUNS ANY BETTER ]
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Why not?! One of us has gotta figure out how to work this thing!
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I mean, the bullet's got to come out eventually! So we just need to keep shooting it until it does!
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So you want me to keep trying?!
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Yes! You're way bigger than me so you don't have to worry about it messing up your arm when it does that [ badly mimes recoil ] thing!
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Okay, I will do six shots but if I get no bullet, you gotta do it.
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[ squinting at it... it's... probably not more than six...??? ]
Um, yeah! Sure, I'll. I can do it after six!!
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Man, tell me I should never get a lottery ticket without saying I should never get a lottery ticket.
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Nnnnn...
[ reluctantly... holds out his hand to take it... ]
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he just yelps and immediately drops it. ]
AaaAAAH! Sorry!!!
[ AT LEAST THERE'S NO BLOOD SO HE'S PRETTY SURE HE DIDN'T ACTUALLY... DO ANYTHING..... ]
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[ He also jumps a little bit but YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S OKAY. No blood!! Just also surprised. ]
Nah, nah, look -- no bullets either! [ Shows him his gloved palm. No hole. Bends down to pick up the gun, opening the chamber again. ] But seriously, what's the point of getting a gun if it's never gonna even fire?
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And sighs very deeply, seems to steel himself up, and then holds the gun to his temple and fires.
And it fires a blank, followed by a really so very undignified 'EEE' as he jumps and halfway throw-drops the gun. ]
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You think that's what we're supposed to be doing?!
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[ Tiptoeing like he's just seen a cockroach to get rid of his NERVES. ]